New European Ice Age Approaches
Bill writes: Memo to the United Kingdom: It's the new millenium. Time to market a frost-free fridge.
When I was a little kid in the 60's, my mother used to have to de-ice our Fridgedaire every few months. That's because we were too cheap to buy a frost-free refrigerator. However, even the $60 Costco fridges you find in any college dorm room are frostless these days. But folks are more rugged here in the UK, and want none of that foppish, new-fangled gimcrackery. No, they like their frost, and plenty of it. So it's only natural that they have developed the frost-full fridge to a high technical state in Britain.
You doubt? On Monday I chipped out all of the ice from the freezer half of the fridge. The freezer portion is the bottom half of the fridge, and is apparently modeled after the lower levels described in Dante's Inferno. One expects that if you open the lowest bin, Satan will be found embedded upside down between the frozen crumpets and Tesco pizza.
So, to return. On Monday, Day 1, we start with a freezer that has no superfluous ice. It's nearly spotless as you can see.

Within 24 hours, you can see it's a tad frosty in there:

On Wednesday, Day 3, there are the definite beginnings of icicleage forming:

By Thursday, it is difficult to open the bottom drawer, while the two upper drawers can now only be opened via ice axe.

Friday shows that any attempt to take out my loaf of Hovis wholemeal bread for breakfast toast results in moderate frostbite and a trip to the hospital.

Saturday, there are definite signs of woolly oxen tracks along the upper escarpment:

Sunday is a day of rest. We left the door open too long, and now the flat is so cold. Only want to sleep. So very, very tired:

Monday. It has been a week now, and all molecular motion has ceased in the fridge. It's become difficult to breathe as I work to defrost the freezer, as oxygen forms a metal at this temperature. We give ourselves Inuit names. The cat's living on seal blubber:

The icons drawn beneath signify some English equivalent of cave paintings. The one on the far right shows the woolly oxen described earlier:

After chipping all of the snow out of our fridge, I decided against using the residue to build an igloo addition to the flat. Instead, I put together a snow memorial in the sink:

What I keep thinking is, "It's June. What will it be like six months from now, in winter?"
When I was a little kid in the 60's, my mother used to have to de-ice our Fridgedaire every few months. That's because we were too cheap to buy a frost-free refrigerator. However, even the $60 Costco fridges you find in any college dorm room are frostless these days. But folks are more rugged here in the UK, and want none of that foppish, new-fangled gimcrackery. No, they like their frost, and plenty of it. So it's only natural that they have developed the frost-full fridge to a high technical state in Britain.
You doubt? On Monday I chipped out all of the ice from the freezer half of the fridge. The freezer portion is the bottom half of the fridge, and is apparently modeled after the lower levels described in Dante's Inferno. One expects that if you open the lowest bin, Satan will be found embedded upside down between the frozen crumpets and Tesco pizza.
So, to return. On Monday, Day 1, we start with a freezer that has no superfluous ice. It's nearly spotless as you can see.

Within 24 hours, you can see it's a tad frosty in there:

On Wednesday, Day 3, there are the definite beginnings of icicleage forming:

By Thursday, it is difficult to open the bottom drawer, while the two upper drawers can now only be opened via ice axe.

Friday shows that any attempt to take out my loaf of Hovis wholemeal bread for breakfast toast results in moderate frostbite and a trip to the hospital.

Saturday, there are definite signs of woolly oxen tracks along the upper escarpment:

Sunday is a day of rest. We left the door open too long, and now the flat is so cold. Only want to sleep. So very, very tired:

Monday. It has been a week now, and all molecular motion has ceased in the fridge. It's become difficult to breathe as I work to defrost the freezer, as oxygen forms a metal at this temperature. We give ourselves Inuit names. The cat's living on seal blubber:

The icons drawn beneath signify some English equivalent of cave paintings. The one on the far right shows the woolly oxen described earlier:

After chipping all of the snow out of our fridge, I decided against using the residue to build an igloo addition to the flat. Instead, I put together a snow memorial in the sink:

What I keep thinking is, "It's June. What will it be like six months from now, in winter?"


1 Comments:
So you have a "freezer web cam" or what? :D
- Weelie -
Post a Comment
<< Home